Thursday, November 27, 2008

Thursday Thirteen

If a fellow isn't thankful for what he's got, he isn't likely to be thankful for what he's going to get.
--Frank A. Clark

How about some lighthearted, "slightly" corny turkey jokes to relieve some stress today?

1. What did the mother turkey say to her disobedient children?

If your father could see you now, he'd turn over in his gravy!

2. How many cooks does it take to stuff a turkey?

One, but you really have to squeeze him in!

3. A lady was picking through the frozen turkeys at the grocery store, but couldn't find one big enough for her family. She asked the stock boy, "Do these turkeys get any bigger?" The stock boy answered, "No ma'am, they're dead."

4. What happened when the turkey got into a fight?

He got the stuffing knocked out of him.

5. Can a turkey jump higher than the Empire State Building?

Yes - a building can't jump at all.

6. Why did they let the turkey join the band?

Because he had the drumsticks!

7. Why did the police arrest the turkey?

They suspected it of fowl play!

8. Which side of the turkey has the most feathers?

The outside.

9. How does a Turkey drink her wine?

In a gobble-let

10. What do turkeys like to do on sunny days?

They like to go on a peck-nic.

11. What do you get when you cross a turkey with an octopus?

Enough drumsticks for Thanksgiving.

12. What did the little turkey say to the big turkey?

"Peck" on someone your own size!

13. What do you get after eating way too much turkey and dressing?

Dessert, of course


Nicholas said...

Happy TT!

Jen said...

LOL! Those are great! Happy Thanksgiving :)

anthonynorth said...

Some great ones there.

Erika said...

hehe great!! i liked the first one and the last one the best!

SandyCarlson said...

I will bring these jokes to the table later. Thanks!

Adelle said...

Oh dear LOL They're so bad, they're good! Happy Turkey Day!

Joy said...

Happy Thanksgiving Diana!

Yasmin said...


Bella Mocha said...

Some cute jokes...I'll have to try them out on the kids later!

Happy Thanksgiving!
Bella :)

Lucy said...

haha BOY did I need a laugh! love these Diane! esp. #1
I am so thankful to have you as my friend.

jenn said...


Happy Thanksgiving!

Tammy said...

I thought these were very cute Diane. :) I'm so grateful cellphones were not big with kids when I had teenagers. Dave and I don't even have one (bad signals in the mountains). My kids now think I'm out of it. lol

Cleaning on black Friday is brilliant, but I'm an organized, cleaning nut. ;)

storyteller said...

LOL - Thanks for the chuckles ... I enjoyed them all ;--)
Hugs and blessings,

Bubba's Sis said...

Love these! Hope you had a Happy Thanksgiving! My computer has been acting up, so I'm just now getting around to reading blogs. Enjoy the rest of your weekend, my friend!

D... said...

Love all of these but #12 made me chuckle out loud!

I hope your Thanksgiving was wonderful!

~TAMY 3 Sides of Crazy~ said...

Hope you had a super fantastic Thanksgiving. The jokes were corny, but I love the quote!! I'm a little slow catching up on reader, but I'll get there!

"J" said...

I'm late! I wished I would have stopped by and seen this! I would have printed it off and read it at my Nanny's during Thankgiving lunch!!! HE HE HE


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