Monday, January 23, 2006

lotsa drama

Oh, there's been lots of drama around our household the past 9 or 10 days. The one I spoke of in the previous post - she snuck out at 2 or 3AM to go see her "boyfriend" (and that's a saga in and of itself). He's a 90 minute drive from here. Well, the next morning, she had laryngitis. We thought it was just her cold that she's had for a week, the reason she'd already missed two days of school. Come to find out, it was from screaming and crying and fighting with this guy. Anyway, I'm still waiting to see what dear hubby does about it. So far, nothing. Even the school is doing more than we are. She has community service for missing too many classes in the morning. That's what happens when parents let their teens parent themselves. He always says, "I trust her." Well, that's all well and good, but as parents, I believe we have to check up on our kids and be in their business so they'll stay out of trouble. He believes he laid the foundation and has to let go now, but he let go long ago.

Oh well. Enough whining and complaining. It's not as if that was the only drama this last week, either. We've had several arguments about parenting, money, the noise level in the house, as well as my being taken for granted around here. What? Do they think their clothes magically appear in their closets and drawers? This isn't Lucky Charms! I work hard! And I do more than laundry. Who cleans, cooks, takes stuff to school when the kids forget it, runs errands, grocery shops, keeps everyone on track going to the right places at the right times, helps with homework, makes the phone calls, pays the bills, and so on and so on? Me! I just want to be appreciated for what I do. Just because I'm only working part time, not full time, that shouldn't make me less valuable than anyone else. If I had to work full time, who would do all the things I do now? I'll answer that. No one! They'd be curled up in the fetal position wondering what was going on if I didn't do those things. Moms are under-appreciated.

We've been discussing ministry and service through our church and life groups the last few weeks, but I don't think it's supposed to mean just my service to my family!

I went to a class at church last weekend, and when the preacher talks about his wife, it's just the best example of love I have ever seen in my life. (They're about our age with kids the ages of our kids.) If my dear hubby loved me like that! I guess I've just felt depressed lately, and I'm not really sure why. Not lovin my life as much right now. Maybe it's a phase. Growing pains. The moon. Whatever it is, it's dampened my spirit.

1 comment:

The Quintessential Feline said...

Take note...a MUST read for newly married couples - the Five Love Languages by Gary Chapman. It puts EVERYTHING in perspective for both you & your spouse. You discover what your personal "love language" is, your spouse discovers his (& yours), and you both end up with a deeper appreciation for yourselves individually, as a couple, and in terms of what love REALLY is. I highly recommend the book.

I read Chapman's book and was so inspired by my finding out what my own love language was that I left a copy in the bathroom with a sticky note marked, "Please read for me, honey. If you don't read the whole thing, at least read the 'Quality Time' chapter (that's my love language)". The book was the only thing I left in the bathroom and the only thing he could read in his personal library. :)

Let's face it, every now and then the I Love You's...as nice as they are...aren't the end all. The human race needs more. Discover what your love language is and let him discover his. Compare notes and see what happens. You might be surprised.

D...don't let these things discourage you. Be encouraged by prayer and support (through your Christian friends). Keep on praying. That's what I did and after many years it worked! Throw a little "self help" in there (i.e. reading of The 5 Love Languages, the Purpose Driven Life, etc.) and you'll be amazed at the changes that take place.

Speaking from one Blogger to another (and one friend who's "been there. done that!").

TQF

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